Dual Identity

I met some old friends on the weekend, it is always nice to see them even we don’t meet that often. It is getting more difficult when people get old, start a family and especially after women have kids. One of my friends said “I still can’t believe we are 30 something women now, we still look so young, who would believe that if we don’t tell people? “ Well, probably true. Sadly though, time does change people, maybe not physically that much but mentally it leave its trace in a more subtle way. I guess you can say it is a confusing age, when you look young and think young most of the time, but then the society, like an intangible force, wakes you up from time to time and make you think about things that belong to your age group. It is a bit struggle between illusion and reality.

The other interesting phenomenon, when I think about my old classmates from high school and university, is this new identity for our generation. We are the generation who have witnessed the swift changes from the late 80s till the new 21st century. There are quite a few of us who have been abroad for studying/working or immigration. The overseas experience does change people in a profound way. We tend to adopt new things more quickly and develop a more independent and broader view of the world than our parents. However, cultural shock, as it is, works both ways. When we came back from abroad, the shortfalls in our home country become amplified and more obvious, and sometimes unbearable. This is the country we love and feel pity for at the same time. And we want to see ourselves as more international citizens, someone who are the beneficiary of China’s reform and wave of globalization, but at the same time we still have our root, which we are strongly attached to.

The demonstration outside the WTO meeting in HongKong is not an isolated case. It is a rather complex issue, a clash between globalization and nationalism, a compromise between short term and long term prosperity. If the world could be no boundaries, we would be happy kids living in this wonder land. But the question is, do we believe we could sacrifice our self interest and try to reach this ultimate goal? Or it is rather a utopia?

Sometimes I am proud and grateful that I am living in the transitional age, but at same time, as this dual identity also impose some confusions, but then again, I enjoy the ride! Life is more about to experience and enjoy the process itself, even not seeing the end result of it.